By Chandrama Anderson
E-mail Chandrama Anderson
About this blog: About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple, Stanford University, and in ... (More)
About this blog: About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple, Stanford University, and in Silicon Valley for 15 years before becoming a therapist. My background in high-tech is helpful in understanding local couples' dynamics and the pressures of living here. I am a wife, mom, sister, friend, author, and lifelong advocate for causes I believe in (such as marriage equality). My parents are both deceased. My son graduated culinary school and is heading toward a degree in Sociology. I enjoy reading, hiking, water fitness, movies, 49ers and Stanford football, Giants baseball, and riding a tandem bike with my husband. I love the beach and mountains; nature is my place of restoration. In my work with couples, and in this blog, I combine knowledge from many fields to bring you my best ideas, tips, tools and skills, plus book and movie reviews, and musings to help you be your genuine self, find your own voice, and have a happy and healthy relationship. Don't be surprised to hear about brain research and business skills, self-soothing techniques from all walks of life, suggestions and experiments, and anything that lights my passion for couples. (Author and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Calif. Lic # MFC 45204.) (Hide)
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A friend of mine was getting discouraged about the online dating scene. He’d been on many dates, met a lot of interesting people, met a few “duds,” (okay, a lot of them), met some women who came close, but not her
I told him, “Remember, she’s on the other end of the thread, looking for you, too.” That seemed to offer a little relief.
The search continued: a woman who was the closest yet, but too many red flags (you know what I mean).
He was going to give it up, but decided to give it one last try, and expand the geographic area. He got one email from her. They went on a date. Now they are married and have a baby.
I have heard a similar story from several people.
So don’t lose hope. Know what your must-haves are. Know what your must-not-haves are. Stick to them, especially your must-not-haves.
S/he’s on the other end of the thread, looking for you, too.