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COUPLE'S NET

Premarital and Couples: Tips for Hearing (Listening) and Being Known

You just want to be heard and understood deeply. Showing interest in your partner and his or her life leads to a great many wonderful things in a relationship....

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Jul. 18, 2019
There are no comments yet. 7322 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Premarital and Couples: Marriage Maintenance

According to research by Dr. John Gottman, who runs the "Love Lab" in Seattle, most couples wait an average of six years from the time they sense issues...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Jul. 26, 2019
There are no comments yet. 7473 Views

COUPLE'S NET

"Real Sex for Real Women" by Dr. Laura Berman

I recommend "Real Sex for Real Women" as it is a straightforward, educational, detailed book about sex -- and emotional connection. Dr. Berman's book provides...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Aug. 1, 2019
There are no comments yet. 17006 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Premarital and Couples: Check Your Best Self at the Door

When you embark on your day, many of you either consciously or by habit, get focused on what lies ahead.  You think about what you need to do and how...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Aug. 9, 2019
There are no comments yet. 7027 Views

COUPLE'S NET

"You Gotta Have Balls [to do counseling] . . .

. . . It's really scary, taking a look at yourself." A man said this to me yesterday while asking for my help. It is scary, it does take balls (or the female...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Aug. 16, 2019
There are no comments yet. 7085 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Premarital and Couples: Permanent Record

We had dinner with our friends recently and learned that their son kept a "Permanent Record" of things his parents had done wrong during his childhood...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Aug. 30, 2019
There are no comments yet. 7046 Views

COUPLE'S NET

In Honor of Ralph

It was my privilege to present at The Compassionate Friends National Conference: "Thriving as a Couple After Your Child Dies." I'll share with you a bit...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Sep. 6, 2019
There are no comments yet. 7070 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Premarital: Women Over 50 Do Get Married

Wedding Bells After Fifty by Autumn Marie is a read I recommend. There's a myth that women over 50 won't get married, and this book is out to dispel that....

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Sep. 13, 2019
There are no comments yet. 7048 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Three Top Thoughts on Letting Go and Moving On

You Can’t Make Yourself Let Go or Move On--So Be Kind to Yourself      While it’s uncomfortable, you need to let yourself feel...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Sep. 26, 2019
There are no comments yet. 7788 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Couples Counseling, Al Pacino Style

I had the pleasure of listening to Pete Pearson of the Couple's Institute in Menlo Park talk about the importance of working as a team in couple's counseling....

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Nov. 8, 2019
There are no comments yet. 7371 Views

COUPLE'S NET

The Four Stages of Competency*

I like to talk with my clients about the The Four Stages of Competency because it provides a simple structure for understanding where we are in therapy, personally...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Nov. 22, 2019
There are no comments yet. 6441 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Living as Roommates? Not Having Much Sex?

I see couples who eventually realize they are living as roommates: they may be good parents together, run their household together, do their respective jobs, spend...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Dec. 6, 2019
There are no comments yet. 8215 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Premarital and Couples: What feeling is not allowed, and what do you use in its place?

What feeling do you not allow yourself to have, either because it is intolerable to you, your family didn't allow it, or it's just too scary or painful to have?...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Dec. 13, 2019
There are no comments yet. 6492 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Premarital and Couples: Road Trips and Getaways

I was recently sent research indicating that a weekend away is the number one romantic gift that both men and women want. David Skernick is a photographer (this...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Dec. 20, 2019
There are no comments yet. 7129 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Premarital and Couples: Do You Give or Receive "Still Face"?

What is Still Face? Watch this short video by Dr. Ed Tronick (director of UMass Boston's Infant-Parent Mental Health...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Jan. 3, 2020
There are no comments yet. 7359 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Premarital and Couples: Thankful / Grateful / Appreciation

Those of you who are my clients already know that I encourage you to be thankful and appreciative, even for the small things that you expect your partner to do,...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Jan. 10, 2020
There are no comments yet. 7063 Views

COUPLE'S NET

You Can Help: Scents and Migraines

Most people have no idea that scents such as perfume, cologne, essential oils, after shave, deodorant, scented detergents and dryer products, household cleaners,...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Jan. 24, 2020
There are no comments yet. 6612 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Premarital and Couples: Are We the Only Couple Having Problems?

No, you are not. Despite how other couples look to you, you are definitely not the only one having problems. In the same way that you don't want anyone to know...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Jan. 31, 2020
There are no comments yet. 6279 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Couples and Premarital : "Who we are . . . depends in part . . . on who we love."

One of my favorite books is "A General Theory of Love." Lewis, Amini and Lannon write poetically about love research, and they talk about limbic resonance,...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Feb. 13, 2020
There are no comments yet. 6084 Views

COUPLE'S NET

Premarital and Couples: Here Be Dragons!

I wrote about the The Four Stages of Competency, that begins with the Unconscious Incompetent, perhaps also known as our unconscious. Jung referred to it as our...

Original post made by Chandrama Anderson on Feb. 21, 2020
There are no comments yet. 5748 Views
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